Every year I watch as some of my friends struggle with celebrations centered around Mother’s day. There are numerous causes for their affliction; infertility, singleness, grief, financial circumstances, and many other valid reasons.
There is a culture of comparison and competition that surrounds Mother’s Day regarding gifts received from both children and husbands. Apparently the bigger the gift means you are loved more. Just scroll through your Facebook newsfeed on Sunday and you’ll see what I mean. This can be off-putting for many as well.
The truth is Mother’s Day is the one and only day that some women are acknowledged with love and value. If we’re honest, many women feel unappreciated, unloved, and unworthy most days. There are many causes for this, but they all come back to one issue; the lie of worthlessness.
See, here is the problem with Mother’s Day — one day a year that celebrates all a woman does not make up for 364 days of feeling unworthy and unloved.
Women need to be celebrated every day.
Yes, you read that right, every day.
No, this doesn’t mean that burnt toast and too bitter coffee needs to be delivered to our bed each day by sticky-fingered children. Nor does it mean we require expensive orchids, jewelry, or spa-day gifts every day — let’s face it, chocolates every day would be a bad idea for our thighs.
No, we don’t need all these special gifts on a daily basis. So, what is it that we desire?
What Every Woman Needs
Let’s start with being humble and transparent with our needs. It begins with admitting to our loved ones that we need reminders and affirmation that we are appreciated and valued for the woman we already are. If we don’t tell our husbands and children our needs how can we expect them to know?
We need our husbands, friends, children, and church leaders to remind us we are enough — not too much or too little — we need to be reminded of who and whose we are, daily.
We need to allow God to convince us, and reconvince us, of how much he values us — his daughter(s). We need to listen to his one true voice rather than negative voices.
We can’t hear God’s voice if we are not actively engaging with him. We need to listen and watch for Holy Spirit hugs that have the strength to empower us.
We need to stop comparing and competing with one another. Instead, we need to start uniting and supporting one another. We need to begin being the example to our families and friends by affirming and serving one another instead of gossiping and fighting each other.
One True Title
As women, we have the distressing habit of comparing ourselves in titles. Mother, Stay-at-home Mom, Homemaker, Working Mom, Single, Married, Childless, Career Woman, Infertile — and the list goes on and on.
Depending on the circle one finds themselves in, there is often an unspoken ranking regarding these titles what a real woman “should be.” The truth is there is no ranking when it comes to who God calls women to be. Jesus calls us all by the same title; Beloved.
The art of believing and living from this beloved title is the real trick. Every day we are being bombarded by social media, television, and even by words and actions of our own loved ones that we are not doing enough, being enough — or worse — we are too much of one thing and not another.
This is why it’s so important to celebrate the women in our lives that we love and care about every day, not just on a designated day. Mother’s Day should be an ongoing celebration of the women in our lives that we love, honor and cherish. We need to celebrate all women for who they are now, in this moment.
Don’t wait till Mother’s Day to remind the women in your life how much they are loved, valued, and appreciated. Tell them today, tomorrow, and every day through actions, words, and deeds.
Happy Mother’s Day, Y’all.